Ups and Downs


It is a strange life I am living these days. I am with people all the time but I never see anyone. I have all the time in the world and no time at all. I want life to go back to normal and I dread the return to a frantically busy reality. I love my family and love the time with them and I occasionally dream of running far away from them. I read all the news and scare myself with what is going on in the world and I, at the same time, feel like I am living in my own little bubble. I am content and I am bored. I am happy and I am anxious.

It is a life of ups and downs.

I have little to complain about. No one in my family and no one I know has gotten sick. We can pay our bills. Our lives are inconvenienced but not difficult. However, as is the case with many, we want the things we can't have. I want to putter through a bookshop, walk by the ocean, go out to dinner with my husband, and search for treasures in a consignment shop. I want to go on vacation, but then, I always want to go on vacation.

For now we have to be happy with the little things; the ups in our day-to-day lives. We have been for a few hikes and spent the afternoon sitting by the stream in a state park. We went kayaking on a friend's pond and were even able to wave hello to our friends as we arrived. We have gardened and finished a few projects around the house and planned a few more projects.

Things could be worse and they are for many people around the world. For now, I shall be content with my life of little ups and downs. As my husband frequently reminds me, excitement is not always a good thing and a nice, long stretch of boredom can be quite refreshing.


4 comments

  1. This piece sums it up so well, it is indeed an existence full of contradictions. Your lovely blog is a great comfort in these times.

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  2. Thank you for sharing your thoughts Jennifer. I only had about 10 days of lockdown before returning to work, so I only had a brief time experiencing what you so beautifully described here. I didn’t get a chance to get to the boredom part though. So for me those 10 days are missed now that I’m back into the routine of work & life slowly opening up here. We still haven’t been out for dinner or caught up with friends. It’s actually nice to have a good excuse to just stay in every night.
    Anyway, thanks for sharing & happy to hear you’re doing fine.

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    1. I do think that when (if?) life returns to normal we will miss the slower pace of life. But I don't think a return to normal will happen anytime soon. They have relaxed the rules here a little and numbers are creeping up again.

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